Black Femme Fatale

a woman's perspective on almost everything..

Can a summer fling of 01 turn into the winter boo of 09? November 10, 2009

Filed under: jolie, lick the wrapper, the manicane diaries — Jolie Fatale @ 1:02 pm
Tags:

Good_Times

Who knows!?

So after the debacle of my Friday and half of my Saturday dealing with the Cornflake I woke up on Sunday morning and decided I would set-up a call to ensure a Sunday date. (Actually, I talked to this guy on Saturday and we decided to hook up on Sunday but I was basically supposed to call him to confirm since I had cancelled on him 6 times in the last month and hadn’t seen him since 2004.)

 

I guess I should tell the background story first.

 

Well I met this man back in 2001. I was 19 and he was (counting on fingers) 22. I was back home from Howard for summer break. I met him while out at a casino. We talked. Talked. Eventually we went out on a few dates and then we were inseparable for the entire summer. I was basically at his house everyday. I would wake up and go to my summer job at Wet n’ Wild, he would go to his job on Base. Did I mention he was in the military (melts……..)?

Anyway, it was summer love; a summer fling. At the end of the summer I returned to Howard. He would call me often but I mean it was Howard, he came to D.C. to visit (he was originally from D.C) and I didn’t take the time to see him. By the time he came there I already had a boyfriend at Howard and I basically had moved on. Anyway.. fast forward to 2004. He gets out of the military (long story) and comes back to D.C. after a 2 year tour in Afghanistan. I met up with him but after 3 years apart he just seemed different. It might have been the time he served abroad, distance or time but I just wasn’t interested. Shortly after we reunited I started a relationship with a new dude that would last about 3 4 years. After that ended in 07 I thought about him but never took the effort to find him. This year no clue when I searched his name on Facebook and LOW AND BEHOLD I found him! We have been talking on FB for months, he then signed up for gmail so we could gchat..

(what he’s been doing for the last few years is another story for another day.. or maybe I should tell it and make this two parts..hmm)

 

Anyway, I’ll tell that tomorrow.

 

So we meet up on Sunday. He lives in Bmore now so he came down to me in my neck of the woods in Maryland. We sat and had a drink or 4 and ate dinner. We talked and talked and talked. It was sooo easy to talk to him that I kept asking myself why I took so long to reconnect with him. He talked about how he had missed me and felt I had been dissing him for years, etc. We talked about old times. That summer had a lot of firsts wrapped around it and especially him.

  1. first time I was ever handcuffed
  2. first time ever being in a waterbed ( I asked him if he still has waterbed luckily the answer was, no)

Anyway, after drinks and dinner we went back to my place and talked some more. One thing led to another and all of a sudden we were 19 and 22 again. It was a great way to end a WEIRD WEEKEND.

 

More on him tomorrow; I think his name will be lolliking.. mandingo.. no.. um SF for Summer Fling.

xoxo,

Jolie

 

“your neck smells good.. you wanna have sex?” November 9, 2009

Filed under: What I hate, jolie, sex, stupidity, the manicane diaries — Jolie Fatale @ 6:45 pm

Some of you who read follow me on twitter and you probably read my tweets from Friday night to late Saturday afternoon. You probably read my pleas for someone to save me. Save me from being stuck with this man who we will call Cornflake. We will call him Cornflake because that is what the majority of my friends called him last year when they met him.  Apparently at the house party he attended with me in NY (where he lives) a JayZ song came on and he didnt recognize it. THE ROOM of people did not let him live it down. After this weekend I’ve come to the conclusion that he is a dork. Ok, honestly I’ve known he was a dork for the 4 yrs I’ve known him but sometimes for some reason I think people will be different the next time I see them. Well he was different.

cornflakes

He was different in the fact that this time he tried to DO ME! Let me back up. Cornflake and I are friends. We’ve always been friends for the past 4 yrs. We shared a kiss for the first time last year. He kisses like a turtle though (he never really sticks his tongue out just kinda rests it at his lips..YUCK!) Anywho, he hit me up 2 wks ago and asked if he could come visit. His parents live here but everytime he comes down he is so caught up with them I never see him. SO since my plans fell through to go to Houston this past weekend I agreed that he could come down. He arrived around 10:30 on Friday. I had been out drinking with a friend and made it home in time to do a quick cleaning of the house and throw my clothes in my guest room. I stay up until 11pm and then head to bed. I leave him in the living room. He comes to my room to sleep around 1am. We sleep. Well he sleeps. He starts to snore like a BEAR and I leave the room shut the door and sleep on my couch. The bed in my guestroom was full of clothes. I can still hear him snore through the door. ughh! Anyway… (this is getting long). Flashforward to after breakfast. I’m laying on the couch so is he..he keeps turning the channel surfing between and Einstein documentary and a Nirvana concert (did I mention this man is black). I fall asleep. Eventually, I wake up .. he comes close says and asks for a hug.. then he says, “your neck smells good.. you wanna have sex?” I reply, “now that you’ve asked actually, NO!”

UGHHH so awkward. HE then asks for a kiss. I decline and say I havent brushed my teeth. He says he doesnt care. I say I do. HE attempts to lay on top of me. I attempt to push him off. THIS is when I make my great escape. I get up and take a shower. I start gchatting my friends asking for a way out. I shower, come out and say “I have bad news. MY mom just flew in from London and I need to pick her up and she is going to stay here, sorry.” He says ok picks up his stuff and says he is going to go to his parents. I escape and breathe a sigh of relief.

I knew.. probably that this shat would happen in the back of my mind YET I brought all of this on myself. It makes for a good laugh now but at the time I was MISERABLE .. ughh

Have you ever said yes to something and then immediately regretted it?

I bring these things on myself .. i know i know

Jolie

 

I never know what direction I want to take this blog in.. November 6, 2009

Filed under: jolie — Jolie Fatale @ 3:33 pm

so I’m up for suggestions..

 

so SUGGEST in the comments or at blackfemmefatale@gmail.com

 

thanks!

 

WHo you ? October 28, 2009

Filed under: jolie — Jolie Fatale @ 2:56 pm

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Sometimes you have to watch the company you keep. You watch the company you keep not only because they can get you in trouble BUT also because they are a reflection of you.
You may bring them around your friends, family and co-workers and think well I’m just introducing but what you are really doing sometimes  is giving the “ok” to those people to move forward without careful evaluation into be-friending them too.
You see the knowledge they have of you as a person and the company you keep automatically makes that person “cool” or “ok, to be around”
The problem with this is, “what if you yourself hasn’t gone through a careful analysis of the person,” “what if there are several character flaws you see in the person but hasn’t boiled over to un-friending” well what could happen is that although you are done with that friend, your friends are still kicking it strong with them or pissed that you ever brought them around.
You also don’t want people looking at you strange like “how could you ever be friends with a person like this?”
All of a sudden people are side-eying you giving you the “WHO YOU!?”
The company you keep is a reflection of who you are as a person. If you are a giver.. keep givers around you. If you are considerate, keep considerate people around you. If you love the Lord.. keep those who love the Lord around you as well. Friendships help build your character in a different way than your parents helped you build it or  how you cultivate your own identity and character . Don’t let the negative effect who you are and the perception that those around you have about you whether it be because of the company you keep or your actions… You don’t want to look in the mirror one day and say “WHO YOU!?”

Your probably like ..”WHAT THE HELL IS JOLIE TALKING ABOUT!?”
OK .. let me put it simply…
When it comes to reputation, perception is reality in the minds of most. Therefore, if your group of friends, associates, co-workers, affiliates and even family members are negatively perceived, then your reputation will be tarnished in the eyes of others. Is it fair?
Absolutely not! It is reality though.

xoxo,

jolie

FYI: I have some of he best people around me and I’m very blessed and HIGHLY favored.

 

MESSAGE!!!! October 21, 2009

Filed under: God, Love, jolie, life, the manicane diaries — Jolie Fatale @ 7:08 am
Tags: , ,

6a00d834518f7769e2010536984ab0970c-500wi
I’ve been seeing, hearing some disturbing tales from my fellow ladies out there. chasing after a man, settlign for less than you deserve.. so I have a message for you!

No Man is worth your tears, but once u find one that is, he will not make you cry.I have found the paradox that if I love untl it hurts, then there is no hurt,only more love..There are many who have been hurt i n life to the point that they believe that they will never be able to love again. This hurt may come from relationships with men who are either family, friends or significant others.

Once you  truly learn to love yourself  and know that God can heal and forgive the past..you will be well on your way to finding the love of your life, YOU!

You can’t lead where there is no love.You cannot save where you do not serve. Be the Blessing to the world that you would  want in return…..

“Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.” Luke 6:38

Hope you all have a good week. Today is my Friday because it is HOWARD HOMECOMING and I took the rest of the week off!!!!!!!!!!  I’ll update you all on the fun!

Best,

Jolie

 

WEEKEND RE-WIND October 19, 2009

Filed under: Dating, intellect, jolie, the manicane diaries — Jolie Fatale @ 11:51 am

Where oh where do I start..

Well most of you who follow me on Twitter know that I had a date on Saturday night. I had talked to the guy on the phone for a good week and a half. I figured that was enough time plus he asked me out so hell WHY NOT! Anyway, he drove down from Northern Virginia for the date..He picks me up at my door like a proper gentleman. He opens the car door. Ok well wait.. let me tell you about the car.. the first thing that came to my mind was:

The car was I think a CAPRICE, it was CANDY APPLE RED, with 20 inch rims and these little skull thingies for the locks. ( I was already sideyeing) BUT I try to be open minded.  Why judge a man by his car? Right? I think.. ummm yeah I might need to go back to being picky patty.

Anywho, we go and see Law Abiding Citizen first before dinner.

citizenposter6

GOOD MOVIE but I jumped, the 6’3 date beside me jumped and the whole audienced jumped at more than once scene. IT had suspense, action, blood, gore..the works. Someone actually had their 3 year old in the movie I was .. well SHOCKED! So after the movie we went to dinner. I ABSOLUTELY hate when men on a first date keep asking you “where do you want to go?” “what do you wanna do?” ughhh. So I decided to keep it local to the movie and my home and go to DuClaw.

Its around 10pm, so we sit down in the booth and we begin to talk. See we talked over the phone prior to the date and quite a bit but there would always be awkward silence on the other end. He said he was just listening that’s why he was so quiet but on this date.. he was SILENT BOB. We sat across from each other with ABSOLUTELY nothing to say. I mean he told me about. I felt like I was probing and then he would respond. When I probed though I found out a couple of things that made me go ummm yeah .. NEXT:

  • He’s not that ambitious
  • His verb/noun conjugation is lacking
  • He told me he was the most successful one out of his friends. (IDK if that’s good or bad)
  • He isn’t a conversationalist
  • He’s interested in getting to know me better (womp, womp)

I was bored. I mean bored to tears. I’m actually glad we went to the movie first because at least I was able to see a good flick. I know for sure there will not be a second date. When you run to the bathroom and twitter about being bored out of your mind well you must be. I’m the kind of person that can talk to anyone and not struggle for topics but talking to him was like plucking the hairs under my arms with tweezers ..one by one (shout out to Shannon for the analogy). I didn’t finish my meal. I told him I was full and packed it on up. He drove me home. THE END.

Sunday:
Woke up early and went to a conference with Jennypenz. Then we went and bought some new winter boots and I then lunch at Red Rock Canyon Grill. They had THE BEST Tortilla Soup I have ever tasted and the bartender Michelle made me one of the best vodka gimlets I’ve had in a while. We then departed after several drinks and lunch and went to Galaxy Billards to watch the Raiders/Eagles game. Raiders WON! Jennypenz who is a Raiders fan proceeded to yell at everyone there who was an eagles fan “Do you need a tissue?!”, “Why are you leaving there is 1 minute left?,” and told those who dared to approach our table “BEAT IT you LOSER!”

The weekend was a HOOT! This week is HOWARD HOMECOMING!!

howard-homecoming1

I took a year off from Homecoming last year.. I’m excited about what’s to come this year.

What did you all do this weekend?

PS: I swear the date was funnier and poor painful but for some reason it was hard to write about. I either came off like an arsehole or the date didn’t seem as bad as I felt it was on the inside.. IDK .. maybe I need creative writing classes.lol

Til next time,

Jolie.

 

He was trying to paint a picture October 13, 2009

Filed under: jolie, the manicane diaries — Jolie Fatale @ 12:27 pm

Thats what Jennypenz said after I forwarded her the email below. ITs KNEE SLAP FUNNY. You see I decided for shats and giggles to try bpm.com. Yeah after this email I think I will be cancelling my subscription. Dude has to be certifiable.

From: SOMEDUDE*

To: Jolie

*smiles at her & gives her a slight wink* *grinnin*

Sooooo, Ms Lady, how’s your Friday coming along for you thus far? *as he grins a bit* Well, as far as mine, It got started around 0350 in the a.m to get my serious workout on at the gym by first running my challenging 3.50 miles in about 28mins outside & (TRUST ME IT HURTS but feels GREAT when I am done! I then do the easy part of fitness, which is hit the weights. Can you hang with a brotha, Huh-Huh???? *LOL* Disregard that I just have much energy with an enormously high Metabolism & Stamina. *licks his tongue out at her*

Let’s see what else can I share with you? Okay, my name is Elbert & I am From Arkansas. *as he extends his right hand out to shake hers & then thinks wait, I’m from the south we greet with a hug* What else, oh okay, so, I currently I reside in the Metro DC area (Cheverly, MD). I’m originally from Arkansas after completing college(University Of Arkansas At Pine Bluff) GO GOLDEN LIONS where I majored in Computer Science & pledged that ICE COLD Fraternity Of ALPHA PHI ALPHA Innnnnnnnncorporated, *smirkin* but now currently work with a company in Alexandria, Virginia as a IT/Software Consultant. Out of college I completed a 5 years in Germany in the Army, got tired of it , got out. Currently now in the Naval Reserves & my unit just returned back from Iraq 8 days ago from an 18 month deployment. It was my 3rd tour.

Hmmm… let’s see, is there anything else, oh I’m about 6′1 and 201 pounds. I think that’s it for now. Think you’re interested?? If so, keep it real & forget the text & emailing notes back and forward, simply call me let’s move forward with either a meaningful friendship or whatever else may develope. I’m open.

Okay, I’ll stop here. Call me, Somedude*###-###-####

Seriously, was he just talking to himself. I know some people need imagery but he took it one STEP too far…. Needless to say I will not be using his number to call him. I hope you all had a good laugh!

xoxo,

Jolie

*name changed to protect him and YOU!*

 

warm fuzzies October 9, 2009

Filed under: jolie — Jolie Fatale @ 2:30 pm

I miss you guys so I decided to blog today. I am still awaiting the good news and praying for favor.

i know i know .. but I still think they were cute together.. lol

i know i know .. but I still think they were cute together.. lol

In the meantime life goes on. As you all know by now Jolie is single again (yes, I did just refer to myself in the 3rd person..sue me). Being single again was my decision and I am okay with it but sometimes you get a little bored and want some male attention.

The other day I was telling my friend Jennypenz how I just wanted someone to cuddle with and kiss the back of my neck. Kiss my back and just hold me tight. I really just wanted someone around. I didn’t consider calling the recent ex because that would just confuse things and I have a belief that when its done its done. So as I am telling her about this I pull up to my best friends house. My best friend is a guy. He needed to borrow my computer so I was dropping it off to him on my way to work. I get off with Jennypenz and tell him the same thing. He says, “aww Jolie it will be alright.” And then he leans in to give me a hug goodbye and KISSES my neck ever so softly. The fuzziness of his beard tickles my neck and the warm of his lips on my skin just gave me the warm and fuzzies inside. I immediately felt better and all the drama of wanting someone to cuddle with went away.

Sometimes your friends have the ability to brighten your day even if they are unaware they are doing it.

Hugs and Warm Kisses,

Jolie

PS: I think I’m going to start writing daily..

 

Good News Soon October 5, 2009

Filed under: jolie — Jolie Fatale @ 11:55 am

pam-mccabe-three-girls-praying

I’m praying really hard I know the Lord knows my heart and things should be settled soon and I will have GREAT NEWS to tell you all.

Jolie

 

God never gave up on me.. September 28, 2009

Filed under: jolie — Jolie Fatale @ 2:55 pm

that songs just in my head. I had a long week last week. I flew back out to my hometown for a 2nd interview. I came back on Saturday morning around 6 am and then attended a black tie gala for CBC weekend. I’m exhausted! This week is going to be a difficult one. I’ll be praying hard. God never gave on me so I’m definitely not going to give up on myself.

How are you?

xoxo,

Jolie