Black Femme Fatale

a woman's perspective on almost everything..

when shallow is not that deep July 28, 2008

Filed under: Dating, Men, women — Jolie Fatale @ 10:09 am

 

I mean which one would you prefer? They are the same people.. Just two different images..

I mean which one would you prefer? They are the same people.. Just two different images..

By Jolie Fatale

 

 

So..I’ve been dating guys the last year after my horrible breakup based on personality. The usual suspects of the attractive, educated and dynamic man in DC usually comes with the extra drama on the side. They love themselves more than they should and they feel as though you should love them more than yourself.

So as I look back on the last year I see a pattern. I went from really good looking men with shitty personalities. To cute men with a few physical flaws whose personalities were golden. They have everything together but themselves in as sense. Its either their style of dress or they are a lil bit overweight. So the question of the day is:

Can a relationship work if you’re not attracted to your partner? Can you still be in love with him/her?

 

I don’t think a relationship can work if you’re not attracted to your partner.Clearly, when we see someone of the opposite sex we are either physically or emotionally attracted to them.In other words, we find something either physically or personality-based that attracts us to them.

If you are not attracted to them physically, or attracted to their personality, then of course, you’re not going to have a romantic relationship.
You could however be in love with someone else, even if, you’re not attracted to them physically.
For instance, you might love them because you’re attracted to their personality. Many couples have married others because of their personalities as opposed to their looks. This explains why you might have a physically unattractive person married to a physically attractive person because they were basing their romantic relationship on their personalities as opposed to their looks.

Bottom line: If there’s no attraction physical, or personality-based, then you can still love them in a platonic, friendly manner, but not romantically as in the type of love you would have for someone else if you were to marry them.
   

  

 

 

 

See and I believe all this .. but its all in theory. I mean I know the concept but when its actually me dating  the person I’m not physically attracted to all the high and mighty BS goes out the window and I look like Shallow Hal!

So America.. and our few loyal commenter’s.. What are your thoughts?

 

Aside:

 

I would also like to apologize for FeFe for dogging her for not giving the short, unattractive guy with a great personality who looked good on paper a try. I mean it sounded good in theory until this crap happened to me.

 

End Aside

 

One Response to “when shallow is not that deep”

  1. V. Clev Says:
    July 28, 2008 at 10:38 am

    Attraction is a major part of any relationship. Many people will kid themselves and say that it isn’t but it is. But that attraction isn’t always based on physical attributes.

    Too often I come across men that are gorgeous and then open their mouths and I suddenly wish I was at home blowdrying my face.

    Reply

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